A World of Ramblings

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Ghosts of You

You know, I am a little tired of this game. I am definitely tired of YOUR ghosts. This is ridiculous and exhausting. It's also leaving me back tracing. It's like I have to fight now, just to expel, extinguish and vanish and absolve your stupid little ghosts.

It was the same thing when I went to Rochester a few months ago. All the angry moments just popped into my head. All the times that I was saddened by you, by your idiotic words that makes no sense, your heartless, nonexistent emotions. Now, we're playing hide and seek here. I don't want to do this. Really. I just want to get up and go on about my day, my time, myself, with my own thoughts that occupy each cell in my head. All of these memories that are popping up, quite honestly, they make me upset. I don't have time to spend on you. It's like wasting it away, throwing it to garbage. Believe me, no matter what you think, I don't have that kind of time to waste. Especially on you. So please, disappear to never return. This game, is not one I am willingly participant of.

There are parts of me I guess that still haven't forgiven you. I doubt they will be in the mood to forgive anytime soon. This is saying something. But I've let go and have gotten myself rid of you. Not a single trace remains. Sure, I've learned my lessons, but the comparisons and the raging pain, sadness, the feeling of being cheated out of, the happiness and the years that has been stolen from me, the confidence that has been shrunk so little, they won't come back. I can't forgive you for that. But other than that, I've moved on to, bigger, better and happier things. So, as far as I am concerned your ghosts are bothersome and a nuisance.

Leave me to myself and you do whatever you like to do with your caveman capabilities that you can't possibly comprehend a single thing I say.

No comments: