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Today is the worst day of my life and I could never, in length, in an open, frank conversation (exception one with myself and my husband) talk about what is really going on as this is the most horrid thing I've ever experienced and the most private to date.
Today is incredibly more challenging, difficult, hurtful, regretful, sorrowful day of my life and even more so than yesterday. This mini trip to Chicago was taken with a particular goal in mind and we have achieved the said mission as it broke our hearts into happiness. Even in such, my only solace and consolation is that, I have a pair of arms who is understanding, patient and healing. I have one heartbeat I could turn to as he would accept, love and let me cry my eyes out, until I am satisfied.
To say, I'm regretting every bit of the action we took, and every reason that got us to here, and every person responsible and the end result is an understatement. I had never imagined such a dark day. Somethings are only imagined and understood through sharing similar experiences. Here's to losing something, I had never wanted to lose.
I will never forgive myself.
Today is the worst day of my life and I could never, in length, in an open, frank conversation (exception one with myself and my husband) talk about what is really going on as this is the most horrid thing I've ever experienced and the most private to date.
Today is incredibly more challenging, difficult, hurtful, regretful, sorrowful day of my life and even more so than yesterday. This mini trip to Chicago was taken with a particular goal in mind and we have achieved the said mission as it broke our hearts into happiness. Even in such, my only solace and consolation is that, I have a pair of arms who is understanding, patient and healing. I have one heartbeat I could turn to as he would accept, love and let me cry my eyes out, until I am satisfied.
To say, I'm regretting every bit of the action we took, and every reason that got us to here, and every person responsible and the end result is an understatement. I had never imagined such a dark day. Somethings are only imagined and understood through sharing similar experiences. Here's to losing something, I had never wanted to lose.
I will never forgive myself.
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