Eventually, you learn to get up, dust off, gather whatever is left unbroken, untouched--that itself, might be the biggest journey you have to make--pack it up, make a new home, somewhere, somehow, along the way, learning to mend all the same wounds you've once dressed secretly on your soul. Shameless!
Then you learn to forget, even if momentarily. Learn to forgive. Learn to move on, even if you do it grudgingly. Even if you come to never forgive yourself. Just forgive yourself enough to continue on to repent for the mistakes of the past.
Then, live. Each day. Sometimes, waking up enough. That's all you can do. That's all you can ask of yourself. Next day, just try going to bed. Even if late. Try. One day, you'll be able to look at that list of yours and see which one needs crossing off next, even as you hate everything about yourself in the past.
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