ya know..

Things that are great are great, but things that are not just doesn't seem to be getting better...the matter of the fact is that they aren't getting any better. And it no longer is my just imagination and being paranoid
Honestly, I am tired from all of this. If things are gonna happen, let them happen. I dont want to give them the battle of my life each time I want to do something. This is kind of...draining every amount of energy, hope, will, effort from my very own core.

Its one battle after another. It's just simple things. Things, can't ever go my way, even once. I don't like taking things for granted, but I don't want my life to be this difficult either. Once in a way, it'd be nice if things easily happened, without having to sacrifice so much. I want to be able to take a breath and end things quickly, without having to crush my dreams in every turn, for the simplest things.

I try every possible way, one after another, but ... I guess when things aren't meant to be, they aren't meant to be. So They don't work.

I keep saying to myself, this time around, I am not going to place my hopes, and I am not going to get excited...but of course that doesnt happen. So I am putting all of my hopes in this time around..if this doesnt work, I dont want to think about the dark path that is awaiting for me.