To tie things together.

Note to self. Definitely save Robert Pattinson's "Never Think."
Also, the Bella lullaby is amazing by Carter Burwell. I hate admitting this but Twilight actually has a good soundtrack. *ugh* Hollywood ruins everything. Edward had always been a special name to me, (no idea why) now they've ruined it for me. Everybody screams Edward Cullen now. They ruined my vampires too. :(. I love a good story about vampires. Vampires don't glitter in the sunlight damn it! Takes out the whole incentive to remain a mortal being. Okay stopping from the whole Twilight mode here, thats a must save for another time when I have less things on my mind and heart.

Its a simple fact about me that I prefer sunsets to sunrises, the moon itself to the sun. Moon is alluring, charming, mysterious, dark, morbid, serene, powerful and pure. It sits upon the sky like a pearl upon the slender, elegant, graceful neck of a noble woman, a woman of power, poise and suffering. This alone probably explains my infatuation with rain, the night, the creatures of the damned, the moon and the theme modification of my stories, poems and melancholy emotions of my writings. It is also a long known thing that I always write about more melancholy and morbid things. It's very rare that I have written love poems, and they are only about two man thus far. Never a third, or a fourth.

Melacholy does suit me best. It is afterall melancholy, sadness and eternal damnation is what I was brought to earh for. The math isn't difficult here. I love all sorts of morbid things, Shakespeare, Nathanial Hawthorne, the Bronte sisters, Halloween, the sadness, tears, autumn, writing, French movies, London, suffering, pain, tears don't seem to be shy to me, nor I prone to them. Of course never in public. I despise that.

This all brings me to this one point. I have been writing a lot lately. Poetry, short stories, random two three pager emotions with a story in itself, no before, or after. Cut in the middle, just then and there. Of course Debussy is the best music list for that :)
I have decided to try at the very least to publish some of them, and to actually officially, systematically work on my that awkward, immortal queen story. I have been working on it, since what? Sophomore year in highschool. I have decided that I am going to keep the story morbid, melancholy, suffering, and hurtful. I was going to add happy things, and end it with a happily eveer after. I have decided to change that as of a few days ago and make everything as bad as I could make a character whom I love deeply as I can. And because probably I love her so much that I will make her suffer so she won't make the mistakes that I have made. I must of rewrote the introduction 15o times at the very least. I have over 250 chapters at my hand, with more always coming, and edited, polished, and I am not even ready to let go of that story, of those characters yet. Maybe I should name him Edward? Considering the emotional attachment I have infested over the years of life, as a way to deal with all bad things happening in my life, and also a dream cursor to me especially. I swear, I see these characters as clear as day in my dreams, as their characters take center stage, events unraveled, and I write about it in the morning when I wake up. Strange. Our relationship has been like that for years. I also of course get half of my ideas from my dreams. That's another story. Not very creative now am I? I have decided to write it and publish it here along the way and enter it into competitions. Now that I have announced in the infinate black hole that is called the internet, as this is now out there, I have no returning back on my word as I have done so, many times previously about getting this done. Now, I can't turn back and must publish. Yay for self made mandatory motivation.