Its five in the morning why am up? I really would like to have a normal, human biological clock and sleeping schedule. Really it would do wonders for my physical and mental health.
Although I have been putting things back into order and trying to make things work. I am remaining helpful still, after all if one doesn't have hope what are you left with? Things have to work out for me eventually, you can only go down for so long right?...I am hoping so. Other wise, I am going to end up in hell both in this world and the next. Living through hell twice wouldn't sound appealing even to an atheist, let along me.
Somewhere along the line of life, something has go give, and my luck has to turn around an somehow give me one last chance to work things out? Misery can't continue to be a big part of anyone's life for so long. Suffering is accepted and welcomed, but even in suffering people are brought together by incredible moments and something to hold on to. That has to come through for me too...one way or another after I've worked so hard?
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